CD copy of ‘It’s Not Really the Apocalypse’. This album comes in a beautifully-presented ‘digipak’ case, featuring original artwork along with an 8-page booklet detailing the storyline behind the music.
Includes unlimited streaming of It's Not Really the Apocalypse
via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
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Streaming + Download
Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
In which one of our protagonists, realising that opportunities for romance are now limited, makes a renewed attempt to chat up another.
lyrics
Do you remember last year when we sat on the pier
and we talked about movies and stuff?
I found you alarming.
Nah! You thought I was charming,
Not to mention handsome and tough!
That’s strange, ‘cos my memory serves me quite differently,
I told you I don’t need a man to survive,
And you stood not a chance of the slightest romance
even if you were the last one alive.
Yes you did say that, didn't you? Well, maybe the time has come for you to reconsider.
What do you mean?
There are only four of us left on the planet. By the looks of things Joe's already taken. So the way I see it, unless you fancy going out with a chicken I'm the best chance you've got!
Oh for goodness’ sake!
I know you said I shouldn’t try,
Till Hell froze over and pigs did fly,
But now the situation’s changed,
I’m sure things could be rearranged,
I know you think that I’m a creep,
But it’s either this or date a sheep,
See you’ve not much choice for what it’s worth,
‘Cos I’m the last man left on earth.
Ba-da-dn da da da ya-dn-dee-dah
Ba-da ya-da-da-dn dee dee-yah
Ba-ya da da ya-dn-da-dah
Ba-da ya-da-da-dn dah.
Oh you act all innocent now, but you’re hardly the gentleman you make out to be. We went on one date together, that’s it. And considering the way you behaved then, you’re lucky I’m still speaking to you at all!
If there’s one thing I hate when it comes to a date,
it’s being groped inappropriately!
Your sordid behaviours did do you no favours,
That’s not the kind of thing that a girl wants to see!
Oh don’t go and tell me you tried to repel me,
You like me much more than you say you do!
Well now I’ve concluded you’re simply deluded,
Believing in things that were never true.
You see, the reason I said you shouldn’t try
is because I think I’d rather die
than spend another hour with you
and your ego that is ten foot two!
Circumference?
Radius.
It’s true my options have run low,
But still my answer is a ‘no,’
I doubt that I could do much worse
than you, the last man left on Earth.
You were rude,
I was witty!
You were lewd,
Not a bitty!
You were crude,
What a pity you don’t understand my charm.
You were crass,
I was clever!
Made a pass,
Who, me? Never!
You’re an ass,
You’re much better living on a farm.
Oh, the answer is a ‘no,’
It really is a ‘no’!
So I think you should go,
Why must it be a ‘no’?
Crawl back under the rock you came from,
Why must you be such a stubborn guy?
I prefer the term ‘persistent’!
That you won’t take my reply and leave me be!
Oh I know you said I shouldn’t try,
Till Hell froze over and pigs did fly,
But now the situation’s changed,
I’m sure things could be rearranged,
I know you think that I am coarse,
But it’s either this or date a horse,
See you’ve not much choice for what it’s worth,
‘Cos I’m the last man left on Earth,
No you’ve not much choice for what it’s worth,
For I’m the last man left on Earth!
Michael A. Grant is a freelance musician, proficient on clarinets, bassoon, saxophones and flute. He is an experienced
performer in a variety of genres, including orchestral music, big band swing and traditional jazz. Furthermore, he is a highly skilled composer and arranger, especially in classical and musical theatre styles....more
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